Social Engineering Blogs

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The Truth About Deception Blog September 10, 2014

Love is in the gaze

How can you tell is someone is in love with you, or just lusting after you?

New research shows that eye contact – how we fix our eyes on another person – can reveal our goals and intentions.

When we are in love with someone, most of our eye contact is directed at their face.  When feeling lustful, our eyes focus on the other person’s body.

Key quote from the research:

“In both studies, therefore, the number of fixations to the face, relative to the number of fixations to the body, was greater for decisions involving love than for decisions involving lust. These findings are consistent with the functional-coupling hypothesis, which posits that visual attention reflects, in part, the features of a stimulus that are most relevant to a person’s intentions or goals.”

Eye contact is not useful when trying to determine if someone is lying.  But, it can give us insight into how people feel about us.

Source:

Bolmont, M., Cacioppo, J. T., & Cacioppo, S. (2014). Love Is in the Gaze An Eye-Tracking Study of Love and Sexual Desire. Psychological Science, 0956797614539706.

Filed Under: Deception, Relationships

The Influence People Blog September 8, 2014

Influencers from Around the World: The Importance of Preparation Before the Sale

This month our Influencers from Around the World post comes from Marco Germani by way of Italy. Marco has been a guest writer for Influence PEOPLE from the start. He combines great knowledge (he wrote a book about persuasion in Italian) with real world experience (he travels the world selling wine). This month’s post is excellent because I can attest to the need for preparation in sales, or any endeavor in life, if you want to succeed. Read Marco’s words of wisdom and enjoy!Brian Ahearn, CMCT® Chief Influence OfficerinfluencePEOPLE Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.The Importance of Preparation Before the SaleA professional athlete would never dream of starting a major competition without any warm-up. This would increase the risk of getting injured and, in the best scenario, drastically reduce the possibility of delivering a great performance. Similarly, a professional salesperson should never approach an important sales call, without the proper “warm-up.” What you do in the 10-15 minutes prior to a face-to-face or telephone conversation with a potential customer may determine the outcome of your presentation. It is therefore surprising how most salespeople completely ignore this principle and too often enter a meeting with a client having no strategic preparation of any kind. Far too many people just listen to the car radio on the way to the appointment filling their brain with commercials, low quality music and what I like to call “chewing gum for the ears.”Let us instead summarize, in three points, what a professional salesperson should do in the minutes leading up to a sales appointment.The first – and Golden Rule – when we are in front of a customer is not to ask any question where the answer can be easily found somewhere else. For example, if I ask my customer information about his company, which I could have found on his company’s website, I am just showing him I didn’t care to do my homework before the meeting. This is a very bad start for any salesperson. If, on the other hand, I say to the customer, “I understand your company has manufacturing facilities in three countries, sells about 80% of its production outside the U.S. and is one of the top three players in the market,” I’m showing my potential customer I’m a professional, serious and committed person who cared enough to learn as much as possible about his business. In addition to showing concern it also prevents wasting the prospect’s time. This is a very good start, which builds trust and opens the door to the possibility of starting a partnership. In the minutes immediately prior to the meeting, it is also a good rule to briefly review your marketing material (presentations, any samples to show, etc.) to make sure everything is in order. Mentally summarize the objectives of the meeting, recall any previous contact with the customer and how you initially met. This is necessary in case you need to refer to past details and it gives you a clear, ideal picture of how you wish your perfect meeting would unfold.Shortly before the meeting put yourself in an upbeat mood and be sure to establish a positive winning attitude. Picture in your mind’s eye the best possible scenario, in which everything goes as planned, and the sale ends in the best possible way, with great benefit to all parties involved. This positive attitude will be perceived by the customer, who will understand he is dealing with a sales professional, who is prepared, confident and ready to help him make the decisions that are in his best interests. These three simple steps, if carried out diligently before a sales appointment, can greatly influence the final result. Often I hear salespeople complain about how hard it is to “bring home” a sale, or how customers are difficult and never seem ready to make a buying decision. If they do not do the preparation I’ve described, or preparation of any kind, then they’re the ones to blame, not the customers! Preparation is 80% of success; let us never forget about it!Marco

Filed Under: Influence, Marco Germani, Psychology, sales

The Humintell Blog September 8, 2014

Gestures and Body Language in Public Speaking

If not used properly, gestures and body language can be distracting and detract from the message of your speech.

Learn to hone your speaking skills by channeling nervous energy into purposeful movement by watching this helpful video below from Toastmasters, a world leader in communication and leadership development.

Click here to view the embedded video.

To learn more about gestures and nonverbal behavior, take a look at our “The World of Gestures” webinar recording!

Filed Under: Nonverbal Behavior

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