Social Engineering Blogs

The Persuasion Revolution Blog January 25, 2017

My Biggest OMGs, WTFs and FMLs from 2 Years in Business

The first 2 years of my business were a strange, psychedelic mix of OMG, WTF and FML.
Lucky for all of us, I came out from it relatively intact and with only minor damage to my brain and ego (or so I think)
Here are some of those gems from my personal collection (and if you don’t get a couple OMGs and AHAs after listening, feel free to kick me in the shins)

WATCH THE FULL VIDEO BELOW

Primed traffic vs Unprimed Traffic

Everything shifts when you make this change. Most conventional advice of FB ads totally misses this part. They all have you sending totally cold, no idea who you are traffic to your OPT IN PAGE!

Money loves speed

Every time I create a programme FAST, it makes me a lot of money. If something if lighting a fire under you – don‘t let it go out!

You are responsible for your brand.

No one else gives a shit. No matter how much you love the people in your team, no matter how much they love you, one day something will get messed up and the only one to pick up the pieces will be YOU.

Start thinking beyond email lists.

Email is only ONE of the many ways you can reach people. This launch I had 30k on my email list but TWO HUNDRED THOUSAND on my pixel list.

Likeability vs Authority:

Some brands position themselves as an authority. They are cool, aloof, they don’t engage. Then you have me. I built my brand on being approachable, I respond to everyone, I send voice notes, I reply to emails. It’s like Ellen vs Oprah (I’m Ellen btw)

Heavy people or light people.

And NO I don’t mean weight. It is how they make you FEEL. Work with people for a small bit first, and notice how you feel when you have to communicate with them. That is going to set the scene for the rest of your relationship.

Courses alone don’t cut it anymore.

If you plan to offer a course, plan another element to go with it. My programs, for example, include my community, my presence, my feedback. And that is what cannot be ripped off.

Live events are the best and the worst.

Suddenly dealing with people one on one – having lunch and dinner and meeting people you have NEVER MET BEFORE. It is all a bit much and totally enriching at the same time

Human beings are assholes.

When you put a human in a position where they can judge you, the assholes will put themselves on a pedestal which they have no place being on. They will be judgy & they will be mean…because YOU just gave them a license to be so. Unless you can handle any kind of feedback at all, do not ask them for it.

The post My Biggest OMGs, WTFs and FMLs from 2 Years in Business appeared first on The Persuasion Revolution.

psychmechanicsblog January 24, 2017

Understanding the psychology of social media sharing

Just as what people say and do in real life tells us who they are, how they act on social media reveals their personality too.

The same underlying motivations that drive the behavior of individuals in real life are at play in the virtual world of social media.

The reasons why people share what they share on social media are numerous but when looked at via the lens of various psychological perspectives, a lot of motivations clear out from the vague haze of random posts, videos, and pictures.

These psychological perspectives are not necessarily mutually exclusive. A single social media behavior could be the result of a combination of motivations highlighted by these perspectives.

Let’s go over these perspectives one by one…

Beliefs and values

You hardly need an in-depth knowledge of human behavior to understand that people like and share stuff on social media that match their beliefs and values.

A guy who favors capitalism, for example, will often post about it. Someone who believes democracy is the ideal form of government will often post about it.

We all have a tendency to reaffirm our beliefs once we’ve formed them. The next psychological perspective explains why…

Ego boost

Our beliefs make up our various identities which in turn make up our ego. Our ego is nothing but a set of beliefs that we have about ourselves. Our ego is how we see ourselves, our image.

The reason why people reaffirm their beliefs is that it helps them maintain or boost their ego.

If I support socialism then reaffirming the awesomeness of socialism boosts my ego because when I say “Socialism is awesome”, I’m indirectly saying, “I’m awesome because I support socialism which is awesome.” (see Why we want others to like what we like)

The same concept can be extended to one’s preferred political party, favorite sports team, celebrities, car and phone models, etc.

Attention craving

Sometimes what people share on social media is just an attempt to get attention.

We all have an innate need to be wanted, liked and being attended to. But, in some people, this need is exaggerated, possibly because they received little attention from their primary caregivers during childhood.

Attention-seekers post more regularly on social media to replete their ‘attention tanks’. If they feel they’re aren’t getting the attention they want they can go to great extremes to force you to pay attention by posting high shock value stuff such as gory pictures, nudity, etc.

Mate value signaling

Social media provides a great platform for men and women to flaunt their value as a suitable mate. This evolutionary psychological perspective is a powerful factor explaining why people share what they share on social media.

Since men who’re resourceful and ambitious are perceived to be ‘high value’ mates, men often share things that directly or indirectly signal these traits.

This is why you see many men sharing pictures of cars, bikes, and gadgets, even setting these as their profile pictures. Resource signaling in men also includes showing off their intelligence (via humor, for example) and occupational achievements.

Mate value in women is predominantly signaled by physical beauty.

This is why the only activity of some women on Facebook is uploading or changing their pictures.

This is also why women frequently use picturing sharing apps like Instagram that allows them to show off their beauty.

Besides beauty, women signal their mate value by displaying ‘nurturing’ behaviors.

Displaying nurturing behavior allows women to signal, “I’m a good mother and I can take good care of babies with the help of my female friends.”

Ancestral women who were nurturing and formed strong relationships with other women to gather food and raise the young together were more successful reproductively than those who did not have these traits.

This is why you see women posting pictures of them holding a cute baby, animal, teddy bear, etc. and stuff that signals how much they cherish friendships and relationships.

When it’s a woman’s best friend’s birthday, you’re likely to see her post a picture of her and her best friend together, along with something like this written in the caption…

I see today is the birthday of my sweetheart, my love, my cutie pie Maria. Oh! dear Maria! Where do I start? As soon as I got the notification about your birthday, my mind drifted to those days we spent together, all the fun that we had when we……………..and so on.

On the contrary, men’s birthday wishes rarely go any longer than, “Happy birthday bro”.

psychmechanicsblog January 18, 2017

How to achieve long term goals (A psychological trick)

Do you find yourself unable to stick to your goals?

Do you quit on your goal as soon as you encounter the first hurdle?

Have you made resolutions countless times only to break them later?

If your answer is in the affirmative to any of the above questions, you’re not alone. Most people are like this because it’s the default way our brains are wired.

With the help of this post, I hope to create a shift in your mindset that will enable you to persist until you accomplish your important goals.

We’re wired for short-term rewards

For the most part of our evolutionary history, our ancestors hunted and gathered food. These were activities that provided instant gratification. The ability to think long-term and plan ahead is fairly recent in our evolutionary history.

This is why it’s easy to indulge in an activity that promises a reward now and difficult to delay gratification. It takes some mental effort to delay gratification and think long-term.

When you’re doing a task, your brain’s default wiring makes it ask, “Is this activity giving me what I want?” This is because you’re inclined to think that rewards are to be attained as soon as possible, that either your activity is taking you towards your goal or away from it.

The figure A below shows what usually happens when you start out on a goal…

figure A

When you reach A starting from O, you see yourself making progress and are highly motivated as a result.

Soon, something goes terribly wrong and you hit a low point B. At B, the goal seems too far away and you’re motivated to quit because you don’t see your efforts yielding any fruits.

Most people quit at this point because, remember, our mind is constantly asking us, “Is this activity giving me what I want?”

If the answer to that question is “No” there’s no point in motivating you to continue pursuing your goal and you’re in a state of demotivation. So you quit because that’s the sane thing to do in such a situation.

A task that eats away your time, energy and resources without providing you with any benefit is perceived as costly by your mind.

You could devote your time, energy and resources to something else that’s probably more promising- such as tasks that provide you with instant gratification. (see why we do what we do and not what we don’t do)

It’s not over yet

What if you hijack the way your mind works to prevent yourself from quitting when things don’t go your way?

The figure A shown above tells us that when we do things that take us closer to our goals we’re motivated to continue and when we do things that take us away from our goal, we’re de-motivated and likely to quit.

What if I told you that figure A is not the whole story?

Yes, figure A is actually a part of a larger figure B shown below…

figure B

The obstacle you faced at B that motivated you to quit was just one of the many obstacles that you were going to face on the journey towards reaching your goal.

Most people quit at B, others do so at D, yet others at F, and some at H. When people are at A, C, E, and G they’re highly motivated because their mind is telling them, “Yes, what I’m doing now has taken me closer to my goal.”

The key message that figure B is sending you is that no matter how many low points and high points you hit on the road to accomplishing your goal, the general trend of the graph is akin to a straight line going upward.

figure C (representing the general trend of figure B)

When you remember this you can trick your mind into thinking that what you’re currently doing is, after, all taking you closer toward your goal over time. You hack your short-term brain wiring to apply it to long-term thinking.

The low point that you may be currently experiencing is but a temporary inconvenience, an insignificant dip in the general upward trend of your efforts.

Whether you’re trying to lose weight, build muscle, start a business, or write a book, and have hit a low point, remind yourself that if you persist you’ll eventually get there.