Social Engineering Blogs

An Aggregator for Blogs About Social Engineering and Related Fields

Negative Emotions

Science Daily reports that toddler boys may have more trouble in coping with negative emotions than their girl counterparts.

Boys, more often than girls, display negative emotions and social fearfulness according to a new study performed by the University of Illinois.

Nancy McElwain, an associate professor of human development at the University, observed 107 children in gathering data on children’s social and emotional development and parent-child relationships.

Children were examined at 33 months and again at 39 months and their parents were asked how they would respond to their children’s behavior in several hypothetical situations.

“We investigated two types of parental reactions to children’s negative emotions.  One type was to minimize their child’s emotions; for example, a parent might say, ‘Stop behaving like a baby’.  Another type of reaction was punishing the child for these emotions.  A parent might send a child to their room or take away a toy” Engle stated.

Parents who punished their kids for fears and frustrations were more likely to have children who were anxious and withdrawn.  This type of response to punishing parenting styles was more prominent among toddler boys.

Engle observed, “When children are upset, it’s better if you can talk with them and help them work through their emotions rather than sending then to their room to work through their feelings on their own.  Young children, especially little boys who are prone to feeling negative emotions intensely, need your comfort and support when their emotions threaten to overwhelm them.”

My Newest Experiment – The Kindle Book

A few months ago, my friend Drawk Kwast released his first ebook on the Kindle store.   And he’s been having some great success (mostly because the book is awesome).  Shortly after, I got my first Kindle and was fascinated by all of the low-cost and interesting self-published books on there that I wouldn’t have found physical access to in the average book store.  It piqued my interest around the Kindle as a publishing platform.

But it wasn’t until I read this story on Slashdot that I really got fascinated.  From the story:

‘These days the buying public looks at a $9.95 eBook and pauses. It’s not an automatic sale,’ says Locke. ‘And the reason it’s not is because the buyer knows when an eBook is priced ten times higher than it has to be. And so the buyer pauses. And it is in this pause—this golden, sweet-scented pause—that we independent authors gain the advantage, because we offer incredible value.’

It was fascinating to me that we could be seeing a sea change in the world of books.

While I’ve been a great consumer of books on the Kindle, I hadn’t yet explored the seller’s side of this new world.

So, I took the ebook I wrote a few years ago (called “Forget the Parachute, Let Me Fly the Plane“) and re-formatted it for the Kindle.  In the process, I updated the content and added in some new material.

And it’s selling in the Kindle store for $2.99.  As of this writing, it’s in the Top 25 in the “Job Hunting” sales list.

My thought: would you trade a cup of coffee for some solid career advice?   I hope to find out.

Technorati Tags: career advice, forget the parachute, kindle


Are You Faking It?

Spring is finally here and that makes a lot of people happy.  The fresh breeze and warm sunshine makes many want to smile.

An article, “Smile Like you Mean It” suggests that positive thinking can create a more positive emotional state, which in turn will allow a person to smile more.  If you smile more, then you will generally be a happier person.  At least that is the consensus.

One study in positive psychology, performed by Harker and Keltner, posited that if a woman had a “Duchenne” smile in her yearbook photo (that is a true mouth and eye smile) then she was more likely to be happily married and less stressed 30 years later.

Dr. Matsumoto has also commented on the “Duchenne” smile, which utilizes the muscles called the orbicularis oculi that raises the cheek bones and forms crow’s feet around the eyes.  He states, “ Remember the Duchenne smile is the only smile that allows for the cheeks to be raised…and you see the eyes twinkling a little bit.”  This is how one can distinguish between a genuine smile and a fake smile.

Many contemporary scientists and ancient philosophers believe that putting on “a happy face” can actually alter a person’s mood.  The Happiness Project website, gives pointers on becoming friendlier and in turn a happier person.

Gretchen Ruben the author of The Happiness Project states that, “Research shows that although we think that we act because of the way we feel, in fact, we often feel because of the way we act.  That’s why one of my Twelve Commandments is to Act the way I want to feel .

How about you; how often do you smile?   Not a fake smile but a real “Duchenne” smile?

If you would like more tips on how to be happy then check these tools and techniques for a happier life.

In the video below Dr. Matsumoto comments  on the “Duchenne” Smile.

Click here to view the embedded video.