Congratulations! Your prospecting efforts have paid off and you’ve set up your first meeting with the prospective client. Now comes the fun part because you’re going to start building relationships, selling and enjoying success.First impressions matter and your initial contact will determine whether or not you go any further for several reasons:Judging the book by its cover. Growing up we were told never to judge a book by its cover, but we do. Sometimes we do it consciously and sometimes it’s subconscious, but we all do it. Your prospect will do it too so leave nothing to chance. How you dress, act and prepare can make all the difference for that initial impression which happens in less than 30 seconds.Do they want to do business? As you talk, beyond the initial judgment we just touched on, the prospect will be assessing many things as he/she decides whether or not to go forward.Do you want to do business? The prospect isn’t the only one making a decision. Not every prospect is a potential fit for you and you should be assessing whether or not this is an individual or company you can, or want, to do business with.There are two chief aims of this meeting: build rapport and ask enough questions to assess whether or not you can, or even want to, do business with this potential client.Sales trainer and author Jeffrey Gitomer is fond of saying, “All things being equal, people prefer to do business with their friends. All things being not so equal, people still prefer to do business with their friends.” This goes to the heart of the principle of liking, which says people prefer to say, “Yes” to those they know and like.Here’s a great example – ladies’ home parties. Whenever I ask an audience how many ladies have been to Tupperware, Mary Kay or Pampered Chef parties, nearly every female’s hand goes up. I can also tell by their reactions they don’t particularly want to go to those parties so I ask why they go. Inevitably they say, “Because a friend invited me.” They’d have no problem saying “No” to a stranger but when it’s a friend it’s hard to say “No.”The more you put someone at ease, the more you offer genuine compliments and the more you connect over what you have in common, the more the other person will come to like you. But wait, there’s more! As you employ this strategy you will come to like them too and when they sense you really like them everything changes!Another way to build rapport is to engage the principle of reciprocity. The reason this builds rapport is twofold. People feel positively towards those who give to them. Secondly, if what you give or share benefits them in some way they feel more positive towards and more indebted to return the favor. That’s effective use of this powerful principle of influence.Here’s an example. Someone who went through one of my Principles of Persuasion Workshops gave his copy of Influence Science and Practice to a client’s son who was just starting out in business. He was amazed at the look on both of their faces and knew what he’d just done was appreciated and would make a difference in their relationship going forward.Knowing what to give and what you can connect on or compliment requires some up front leg work. Doing a little research online and talking with people who know the prospect shouldn’t take much time and might be a goldmine of ideas on how to leverage both liking and reciprocity. Again, one major goal of the meeting is to have the opportunity to go to the next step in the sales process so building rapport is a must.Next time we’ll look at the qualification process where you really begin to understand the prospect, his/her business and needs. Two principles of influence are especially helpful in this phase of the sales cycle.
Brian Ahearn, CMCT® Chief Influence Officer influencePEOPLE Helping You Learn to Hear “Yes”.
Anchoring Effect
This psychological principle called anchoring was discovered by Amos Tversky and Daniel Kahneman. These two researchers found that people tend to make judgements by using relative distances from anchor points.
In their study, participants were asked to compute, the product of the numbers one through eight, either as 1 x 2 x 3 x 4 x 5 x 6 x 7 x 8 or as 8 x 7 x 6 x 5 x 4 x 3 x 2 x 1 within 5 seconds. Because participants did not have enough time to calculate the full answer, they had to make an estimate after their first few multiplications. When the sequence started with small numbers, the median estimate was 512, when the sequence started with the larger numbers, the median estimate was 2 250.
This is used in sales where, say you are buying an expensive suit for $10 000, at the checkout they offer you shoes for $500. You’ll be more inclined to buy those shoes than if you were buying a T-Shirt for $50 instead of a suit because it doesn’t seem that much money in comparison.
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Top 10 Techniques To Build Rapport With Anyone
Rapport is without a doubt one of the most important aspects of Social Engineering.
So you may want to know how to build one.
I present you The Top 10 Techniques to Build Rapport with Anyone from a book you can find here, called “It’s Not All About Me“
Technique 1: Establishing Artificial Time Constraints
When you approach starngers in Starbucks and start a conversation they can feel a little awkward. That’s because the stranger doesn’t know when the conversation will end.
So to make it easier you can start your conversations with something like “I’m on my way out but before I left I wanted to ask you…”
This way everything will feel more at ease.
Technique 2: Accommodating Nonverbals
The majority of how people communicate is through body language. That means if you display threatening behavior people will not want to talk to you.
Your words and body language must be aligned and non-threatening. And if you smile it’s even better
Technique 3: Slower Rate of Speech
When individuals speak slowly and clearly, they tend to sound more credible than those who speak quickly.
You’ll also sound more confident so make sure to speak more slowly when interacting with other person.
Technique 4: Sympathy or Assistance Theme
“Have you ever felt a pang of guilt for turning down someone seeking help…….. Think for a moment about the times in your life when you have either sought assistance or been asked to provide it. When the request is simple, of limited duration, and non-threatening, we are more inclined to accommodate the request“
This is because in ancient times when everybody was in tribes. If you didn’t help others, they wouldn’t help you so you’d die. It’s the same today.
Technique 5: Ego Suspension
Eho Suspension means that when you’re arguing with somebody you say that they’re right even though you know they aren’t.
This can be hard to do, but it’s also really worthit because tgis technique is probably the most powerful of all ten.
So I encourage you to try it out and you’ll be amazed.
Technique 6: Validate Others
Everybody wants to be liked. And everybody is seeking approval others, and when you give it to them they’ll start to like you and will want to be around you to receive that approval.
Validation Technique 1: Listening
The easiest thing you can do is linsten to what the other person is saying. That may sound simple but it really isn’t. You need to REALLY listen and can’t think about anything else or the other person will sense that you’re not really listening.
Validation Technique 2: Thoughtfulness
“Thoughtfulness is probably the most commonly used of the validation techniques but in a limited manner. I want to emphasize it here because I have found through my practical application of these techniques, as well as study of personality types, that few people naturally use this to its fullest potential, and, most of the time, we don’t realize when it is being used; all we know is we really like the person who gives it“
Thoughtfulness simply means that you care about others well-being. For example asking “How are you doing“ etc.
Validation Technique 3: Validate Thoughts and Opinions
“Most human beings are very self-centered. We are biologically bred to be self-centered as a survival mechanism. That is why when in stressful survival type situations, our natural inclinations are to take care of our own safety first then the needs of others. That is also why when we witness what we consider heroic acts of others, we are recognizing how some individuals have defied their own genetics and biology and made a choice to put others’ needs and wants first. These are considered admirable qualities because they go against our innate egocentric survival mechanisms“
This is similar to Ego Suspension, you can’t correct a person if they say something you know is wrong. All human beings naturally make a connection with people who think like them. So if you seem to be like them they’ll want to be around you.
Technique 7: Ask… How? When? Why?
I think you already know what this is and how it works.
In a conversation asking people How? When? Why? signals that you care about them. These questions are also good when you don’t know what to say, you simply ask a question about something the other person said earlier. That way you never run out of things to say.
“One of the key concepts that every great interviewer or conversationalist knows is to ask open ended questions. Open ended questions are ones that don’t require a simple yes or no answer. They are generally questions that require more words and thought. Once the individual being targeted in the conversation supplies more words and thought, a great conversationalist will utilize the content given and continue to ask open ended questions about the same content“
Technique 8: Connect With Quid Pro
This means that you give a little information about yourself in order to get information about the other person, or to open them up.
This technique is good with people who are very introverted or guarded but otherwise you won’t need to use it that much.
Technique 9: Gift Giving (Reciprocal Altruism)
“Most people would feel badly if they received a gift and forgot to say or send a thank you note to the giver. When someone does you a favor you most likely want to reciprocate with gratitude. Great rapport builders and conversationalists use this desire proactively during every conversation. This technique, coupled with ego suspension, are the cornerstones for building great relationships. This is also the easiest technique to utilize, because gifts come in many forms, from non-material compliments, to tangible material gifts. Gift giving, or reciprocal altruism, is hardwired in our genetics“
Receiving a gift feels good doesn’t it, but you also feel bad if you don’t reciprocate and give a gift to the other person.
In caveman times when the hunters returned back to the tribe from hunting, they either shared the food or they didn’t. When they didn’t others wouldn’t share food with them, so if the next time they weren’t so successful or becae injured they’d die because nobody would help them.
Technique 10: Manage Expectations
“Every conversation or engagement with another human being has an agenda. Another definition of agenda might be objective or desired outcome. Sometimes the agenda is to sell you a used car. Sometimes the agenda is to share a secret. Other times, it is simply to make another person feel better. Regardless of the situation, whether it is an altruistic intention or not, there is an agenda. The individuals in life that are able to either mask their agenda or shift the agenda to something altruistic will have great success at building rapport“
When you manage your expectations so that the conversation is for their benefit and not yours you’ll be at ease and not look sleazy. Which is great.
If you want to learn more about building rapport, be sure to read the book.
The post Top 10 Techniques To Build Rapport With Anyone appeared first on Social Engineering.
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